Escaping to Elegance

Sometimes I like to wear a tie. In Berlin, people don’t like to wear a tie, which was something that I quickly came to realise. I saw the pitying glances – on the underground every morning. They said: “This
poor chap needs to wear a tie for work.” I saw glances that betrayed a lack of understanding – on the banks of the river in the evening. They were saying:
 “What kind of a stiff is this?”

I had moved from Bolzano to Berlin ten years ago and had feared the worst. Ever since our childhood days, we had thought of Germans as beerbellied people wearing white socks and sandals. It didn’t turn out that bad – it turned out bad in a different way. Berlin appeared to me to be a city whose inhabitants are keen to look fashionable but comfortable and, most importantly, youthful. 

I swear that I haven’t seen 30 women in high heels in the last ten years, just women sporting worn-out sneakers. I felt surrounded by men in their mid-thirties squeezing their mid-thirties thighs into ultra-skinny jeans carrying a skateboard.

At the Komische Oper, Heiko Maas was chosen as best dressed man by the German GQ. I thought this was very strange, as Maas always looks like a Playmobil figure in a Playmobil suit. What I didn’t find very funny was my slow transformation into a version of Maas. I could no longer handle the disapproving glances. Soon, my ties started to gather dust in my wardrobe, polo shirts replaced regular shirts. I degenerated. Finally, I escaped. 

I’ve been living in Bolzano again for a year now. I spend a lot of time in Venice and Milan. I observe the accomplished swagger of Italian men admiring their casual elegance. They notice my desperate attempt to look just as casual. Their smiles tell me that trying hard to be casual doesn’t work, poveretto! Ten years in Berlin have left their mark on me.

Lenz Koppelstätter is book author, reporter for GEO Saison, Salon, B-Eat and a copy editor at AW Spezial. He lives in Bolzano, loves the click-clack of high heels underneath shady pergolas and despises flip-flops when not worn on beaches. 

This column has first been published in the printed edition of 30 Grad in autumn 2019. You can subscribe here for free.